Reality Bites

my reality certainly does -- still no steady income, anxiety all around, whine, whine, whine. i'm tired of telling my own story, or even listening to myself tell it. i feel like a one-trick pony. people's eyes glaze over when i begin the woe-is-me-i'm-unemployed show. they've heard it before. even the politest ones now grit their teeth and endure. i'm trying to suck it up. i've even come to see this time off as being valuable. only problem is that this time has little value without the funds to enjoy it. if i had some cash to shop all day, get massages and pedicures, that would be something of great value, but i don't. and there i go whining again.

good news is that i found a part-time gig with a company i hope to establish a long and wonderful relationship with. so next week holds some (paid!) training for becoming one of their SAT tutors. i actually had to take the exam, and it's changed over the years. new essay writing section, no analogies, but still way easier than the GRE. should be a fun gig. i've tutored before and have always enjoyed it. nothing beats that instant gratification one gets from teaching someone something. that lightbulb goes on over their heads and it feels like a homerun. but i digress.

i actually wanted to discuss a different aspect of reality, a new addiction of mine that's somewhat disturbing. i've become fixated on reality television lately. it all started when i got bunny ears for my TV set a few months back. before that, my TV was only used for movie rentals. (cable television is not an option, and hasn't been for years.) so now i had channels 2-13 to watch in all their crappy glory. the mainstays of my television watching were 'jeopardy' and 'seinfeld' in syndication. current sitcoms and hourlong dramas didn't really do it for me. i sampled various ones and just never connected with anything, mostly because the writing sucked and i just didn't buy into the relationships these characters had with each other. moreover, i just couldn't relate to these people. too many of today's sitcoms are centered around 'quirky' families, and there's nothing particularly novel or quirky about the approach used to portray these families. it's no 'roseanne' or even 'cosby show.' friend-centered comedies like 'seinfeld' and even 'friends' (which i never found funny) work best for childless, social people of a certain age. ok, my age, my generation. how about making a 'cheers' for twentysomethings?

so in my quest for entertainment, i turn to the reality show, which are plentiful on the boob. and wow, how easy are those to connect with -- regular folks, real-life drama, less predictability, the whole spectrum of human emotions on display. and the best part is that reality shows are like bite-sized pieces of entertainment where old storylines and character arcs don't amount to shit. you can tune in in the middle and not be confused. following the season isn't necessary, though yes, it can help. the only season i've really been following closely is 'america's top model,' for which justin has called me a lesbian. the makeover shows -- i can't get enough!! 'extreme makeover' i just love. and i dig the wife-swapping shows as well -- 'wife swap' and 'trading spouses.' the nanny shows aren't bad either. 'fear factor' i stay away from since it can turn my stomach a bit and i generally avoid those 'survivor'/'apprentice' type shows where contestants are eliminated each week, because of that whole needing-to-follow-the-season thing. but otherwise, i'm up for anything reality and i'm not ashamed to admit it -- though perhaps i should be?

in any case, i can safely and proudly say that despite my interest in reality shows, i've never once been tempted to join the cast of one (though the free lasik eye surgery and porcelian veneers they give people on 'extreme makeover' are very appealing). but nope, you still won't find me trying out, because despite the potential perks, it's still embarassing to be showcasing your sad and/or nasty self or misbehaved kids on national television. it's akin to being on 'the jerry springer show.' but when you're desperate for your 15 minutes of fame, i guess any which way will do. but hey, as long as it's entertaining, i'm not complaining.