Dish-Interested: Sex Addictions Are the New Adopted Ethnic Babies

Photo courtesy of Osmosis Online

By now we’ve all heard about the marital woes between Sandra Bullock and Jesse James, the latest Hollywood couple to go up in flames in an epic cheating scandal of Tiger Woods proportions. Beyond taking the focus off of Tiger — who I hope sent Jesse a thank-you note — this scandal features another celebrity who, like Tiger, tried to pin his sluttiness on a sex addiction, one he received treatment for at a rehab center, instead of acknowledging the more obvious cause of his problems: being an asshole.

It’s as though no one in Hollywood can admit to acting stupid anymore without pointing to some addiction or disease as an explanation, essentially absolving them of having to assume any responsibility for their bad behavior while also denigrating people who, you know, struggle with actual addictions and diseases. In addition to Tiger and Jesse, David Duchovny, Russell Brand and Eric Benet (Halle Berry’s ex) have also been treated for their crippling inability to control their wild penises. And I’m sure after they left rehab, none of them ever had sex again. After all, recovering addicts are never allowed to use drugs or alcohol again. Just take it one blue ball at a time, guys.

But before we cart Jesse off to a 12-step program for his “sickness,” let’s not forget...